Sounder SIGN UP FOR FREE
What Women Want Today
What Women Want Today

Episode · 1 year ago

Sleep Hygiene

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Over 67% of women in the US have admitted to suffering 3 or 4 nights a week from a poor night's sleep. In today's episode, I am going to share tips with you to set the stage for a good night of sleep.   Tips on your bedding, your food and beverage .. and the ONLY 2 things your bedroom should be used for. Website: www.whatwomenwanttoday.com  Private FB Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/www2day

Hello and welcome to what women on today podcast. You might be asking yourself right about now. Well, what do women want? I mean, we're pretty complex creatures, right. Well, I think we weren't it all, and I'm here to explore with you. My name is Terry Kellums, I'm your host. Go grab your favorite beverage, I've already got my glass of wine, and let's get started. Hello and welcome back to what women want today podcast. My name is Terry Kellum's, I'm your host. This is episode seven and today I want to talk to you about sleep Hygi if you remember, back in episode two with Laurna Shannon, when we talked about insomnia, this has been on the back of my mind since that episode. I mentioned the term sleep hygiene and I decided today that I would dive in a little more into that topic with you and share a few things I learned when I was dealing with sleep issues. So a lot of sleeping issues I experienced at first were largely due to anxiety. I had recently moved from a small town in Illinois where I grew up to Phoenix, Arizona, and I was moving there to start a new position with a company I've been with for about the previous five to six years, but I was starting over. I was leaving the comfort of my small town where I grew up. I had friends and family and you know, when you've lived somewhere a long time, there's that familiarity in that comfort that comes along with it. Even though it was a move that I did want to make, it was really tough to move to a new city, and a big city at that, to a new job a place where I knew like two people. Shortly after I moved there I became a single parent. So all of this was happening in a pretty short amount of time. I don't think I really acknowledged all of that at the time. I just started doing what a lot of us do when we can't sleep or we have an acre pain. I went right for the time...

...and all PM and never really took the time to stop and assess the reasons why I wasn't sleeping. But after some time of doing the over the counter stuff, it stopped working and I was getting concerned that I was unable to sleep without some sort of medication, and this was the beginning of my journey to doctors and sleep studies. Lots of different medications and, eventually, alternative therapies. I wanted to share with you today some of the things I learned along the way about sitting the stage for a good night's sleep. I've got twelve of them all right, here we go. So it's all about making the bedroom a desirable place to be. It's almost I kept up a good relationship with your bedroom. I think I mentioned on a past episode, it might I think it was the one with Lauren a Shannon, where I said I almost started dreading going into the bedroom because I was associating it with a place of extreme discomfort for me, a place of a lot of anxiety and tossing and turning. So when I say making the bedroom a desirable place to be, you can start with something as simple as your betting. If your betting's not comfortable, if it's, you know, maybe something that you don't enjoy, or is Marie condo would say, if it's not something that sparks joy within you, I would encourage starting there. There are so many options out there about thread count or fabric, so do some research and ask your friends for recommendation. I will give you my personal recommendation and it is bamboo and love bamboo sheets. They are soft, they keep you cooler, they're older and allergy resistant, and this is really helpful if you're experiencing those frequent night sweats. If you're environmentally conscious, they meet that criteria as well. Making sure that your bedroom is free of clutter. It's something we want to walk into and immediately feel like it's a place that we don't want to be because we haven't taken the time to make it a welcoming space. I alsill...

...find that smells can be very distracting, and this is definitely an individual thing, but smells are associated with different ships in the brain. So well, lavender can be very relaxing, citrus or peppermint is meant to be stimulating. Lighting is another issue. So you want to make sure that your room is dark, even the you know, the blackout curtains are great. You want to make sure that there are any electronics in the room that are a meeting light sounds. Now this one is a again a very individual thing. I actually really prefer to sleep to some kind of like noise machine. I used to use a fan, I graduated to the noise machine. This was hard for my husband to get used to. Because he had always just slept in quiet and a funny story one time we had gone up to his hunting ranch and when we got there we had to turn the generator on. The generator would make the pump work, the water pump, and we had to leave it on all night, through the night, and it was you know, it wasn't it wasn't quiet for sure, but I didn't use any kind of fan or sleep machine or APP on my phone that night and in the middle of the night, I think it was about two o'clock, if I remember correctly, the generator just suddenly shut off and I was awake, and I mean that like startling, wide awake and you're asking yourself, why, why am I awake? So I just find that the continual noise from a fan or a noise machine, it's just that it brings that comforting sleep and you don't tend to wake up as much when you hear a little every little creak and grown in the middle of the night. I even have found that when we travel there are some great apps that have different sounds to fall asleep to. The one I'm using currently is a fan sound and I really love that one. But I've also in the past used different ones that there are many, many different noises to choose from, like waterfalls and ocean waves and crickets...

...and yeah, just lots of different APPs to choose from out there. So if that's something that you're interested in, definitely do some research. Temperature is a big deal. So the ideal temperature for most adults is between sixty and seventy two degrees. And I'm guessing when they use that range the sixty degrees is for us men of balls the women. I'm just saying be my husband. We kind of battle over the temperature in the bedroom and thankfully for me, He lets me win. All right. So the next thing is use this bedroom for two things, sleep and sex. So ideally no TV in the bedroom at all and definitely not before you go to sleep, and no drinking coffee in your bed in the morning. These two were pretty rough adjustments for my husband and I. So I when I was growing I came from a pretty hardcore coffee family. I mean I was drinking coffee at a pretty young age, but we always drink our coffee in the kitchen or at the dining room table, never ever in the bedroom. And then I met my husband and our kids were younger, and if they were watching their TV shows in the living room and we wanted to go watch something different, we would head off to the bedroom and hang out in there for like an hour or so before bedtime and watch a show or just hang out in there. And then in the morning he would get up and go out and make our coffee, and it was so nice for me to just be able to stay in the bed. It was so warm and cozy. So he would bring the coffee to the bed and we would just sit there and would drink our coffee and talk about our day and just kind of hang out there a little bit before we were ready to get up and get going for the day. But these things are confusing for the brain now it doesn't know if it should associate the bedroom with entertainment and from the TV, or sleep or simulation from the coffee. So by using the bedroom for just two things, sleep and sex,...

...it knows exactly what the bedroom is for. And I mean, I guess sex could be considered entertainment, but we should probably leave that subject for another day. One of the worst things, though, that you can do is to stay in bed when you can't sleep. So if you find yourself laying there tossing and turning and tossing and turning, and this is a regular occurrence for you, I would do a little bit of planning ahead. I would grab like a blanket, put it on the comfy chair and you're living room or any other room that's away from the bedroom. Make sure that there's a lamp with low light and maybe a book that you can read while you're sitting there. But I do warn you to resist a temptation to reward yourself for being awake like smacking. Just sit there and read until you feel sleepy and then go in the bedroom and try again. Exercising too close to bedtime so exercise releases hormones, psych adrenaline or PERNEF friend and court as all, and it can make it difficult to fall asleep. So aim to complete your most vigorous exercising for about three hours before bedtime. But I know there are some wonderful yoga routines designed to help you sleep on pinterest in Youtube, so maybe you could check those out. I know that something that I plan on doing very soon. All right, another one is to avoid TV or books that are too stimulating this is not a time to be reading a steeping king novel or watching game of thrones. I remember when we were watching sons of anarchy or even the handmaid's tale. It would get my heart wrapped up so fast. It would be beating in my chest so fast it felt hard to calm down and I would kind of take that whole ramped up feeling, that anxiety type feeling, into the bedroom and we were going to sleep and I would end up dreaming about it. So if you're a little more sensitive to things like that, like I am, make sure you wind down in the evening with something a little the more call me. Another one to consider is wearing blue light blocking glasses. So if you're like me and you work on...

...the computer a lot during the day or spend lots of time on a tablet or your cell phone, and then you spend a good honk of time in the evening watching TV, you would definitely benefit from these glasses. This is definitely a time to do a little research. The cheaper versions may not give you the protection you need and therefore the results will not be adequate. Actually went for my annual I exam to day and was talking to my doctor and he kind of narrowed it down to two different options when it comes to the blue light blocking glasses. One tends to be a little bit more color altering and can make you look like you're looking at Cepia colors, and then there's the other one, and I opted for the second one, is just set. You know, I wear contacts most of the time and I do have a pair of really nice blue light blocking glasses for when I'm wearing my contacts, but then, you know, early evening I tend to take them out and I'm watching TV, and so I opted to get a prescription that has the blue light blocking glasses for my evening things or for the days when I, you know, don't want to wear my contacts. All right, so food and drink is my next topic. So this is interesting. So be mindful of what you eat and drink and when. I know we've all heard the term nightcap and it leads us to believe that if we drink alcohol we sleep better. But the true with this. Even though we may feel sleepy, we don't stay asleep. A call creates that sedating effect and it does decrease the amount of time it takes us to fall asleep, but it actually negatively affects the quality of sleep, kind of leaving to that next day drowsiness and grogginess. So when you drink a large amount of alcohol too close to bedtime, you can skip that first stay to sleep all together, entering right into the deep sleep immediately. But then, as the alcohol wears off, the body leaves that deep sleep phase and returns to the Rem Sleep, which is much easier to wake up from. So, comparing to a non drinking individual, who may experience six or seven cycles of rem sleeper night, someone...

...who has consumed alcohol before bed may only experience one or two, and that's what causes that feeling of exhaustion upon waking the next day. Also, drinking too much before sleeping can cause you to snore because it relaxes muscles in the body. It can cause the throat, mouth and nose to stop air from flowing smoothly. And also, study show that people who rely on alcohol to fall asleep are at an increased risk of sleepwalking, sleep talking and memory problems. Our next drink, which is one of my favorite, caffeine. I actually know people who say they can drink coffee right up until the time they go to bed, but for most of us that just isn't the case. It can take a full three thus two hundred and sixty minutes after you have your morning coffee, for it's a kick in in the average adult, though, the half life of caffeine is about five to six hours. So it means that once you take that dose of caffeine, you'll only break down half the amount of that caffeine after five or six hours. So if you're out to dinner and you're having dessert and coffee and let's say at seven PM, you'll still have half that amount of caffeine in your system from between like midnight and when I am so keep this in mind when you're enjoying that coffee with your dessert. But while we're in my talking about dessert, we're going to talk about sugar. So dark chocolate, which I highly endorsed in small amounts, not only has sugar but caffeine as well. So if you're someone who needs to set a little bit of sweet something in the evening, I know my husband's like this, I want to give you a list of foods to consider instead. So Tart Cherries, bananas, almonds, Walnuts, flax, seed, pumpkin seed, sweet potatoes. This is more for a dinner time suggestion. But Turkey. Turkey is good, but for some reason when you combine it with Rice it's even better. Valerian and Chem Mill Tea yogurt because of the calcium. So maybe you could consider a little yogurt parfait, like...

...a good Greek nonsweeten yogurt with slice bananas and chopped walnuts or any of the other nuts I mentioned. And I have heard that tart carry juice is good, but when I looked into it I saw the amount of sugar it contained and not not really much of a juice drinker anyway. I would just suggest a game with the cherries. All right. The next one is all about our state of mind, and this one has been a big one for me. I've never been good at being upset and being able to just set it aside for sleep, so I have spent way too many nights hashing out something that is upsetting me. The problem most of the time is that the person I was upset with wasn't there for me to talk things out with, so I tended to get more upset and fill in the blanks in the situation without their input and our imaginations are so much more vivid and stressful situations, and definitely more so in the middle of the night. I have two possible suggestions for this. One would be to try to never let the Sunsett on your anger. I think most of us have heard that before. But second I would say to try to get to a place where you deal with things as they occur and resolve them as quick as possible. Yeah, I'm still working on that one. Or tried this have an agreement with the person that says no matter if we are upset with a situation, it doesn't change the way we feel about each other, and I am definitely committed to working this out with you. Another one might be to just try writing things down. Many people have told me that they keep a notepad at the side of their bed to jot things down before they go to sleeve pepe or when they wake up in the middle of the night. There's something about the brain. If you write it down, it's almost as if you're telling your brain I don't have to remember this or think about this anymore because it's down on this piece of paper, and then hopefully you can just move on. This is a tough one for some people as well, keeping a consistent bedtime and awake time, even on the weekends. Yeah, I know we can comes and we don't...

...have to go to work the next day, so it's very tempting for us to stay up late and want to movie or go to a comedy club or hang out with our friends playing cards or whatever it is we like to do. But it is something that's helpful if you're having sleep is shoes to try to maintain that consistent waken sleep time. The caveat to that is it's not recommended to go to sleep if you don't feel like you're ready to go to sleep yet. So this is going to take a little bit of time to develop that practice. Another thing is if you did have a rough night of sleep, resist the urge to take a nap the next day. It's kind of set you into a cycle. I know already talked about caffeine having that half life of five to six hours, but I have heard really good results with eating an apple midafternoon if you feel sleepy. Another thing that has worked for me in the past is just taking a short, brisk walk. Doesn't have to be a long one. But just, you know, maybe a short, brisk walk around the neighborhood or something, and then just doing some nice deep breathing, because a lot of times during the day we feel sleepy because we slouch and we don't allow ourselves to take full enough breaths. This is another one that my doctor told me about your circadian rhythm. So if your sleep and wake cycles are off, you can try to begin each day watching the sunrise and then, in the evening, watching the sunset. I was reading a little bit about this online. It's a really interesting read. It said during the day, light exposure causes the master clock to send signals that generate alertness and help keep us awake and active. As nightfalls, the master clock initiates the production of Melatonin, which is a hormone that promotes sleep, and then keeps transmitting signals that help us stay asleep to the night and that is your circadian rhythm. So some of these things I've talked about today are pretty big things to consider, and I know people who insist they have to fall asleep to the sound of TV, but I would recommend you asking yourself this question. If the TV is on, are you really getting sound sleep? Would you be able to find some soothing music or a noise machine...

...or something else you could fall to sleep to instead, or sound of the fan or anything that makes a consistent sound? And, like I said before, there are plenty of APPs out there for you to explore other sounds that you might enjoy falling asleep too. There's an Irish proverb that says a good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book. Friends, I hope you found value in some of the tips I shared with you today. Sleep is such an essential part of the quality of our lives. I'd love for you to join us in the private facebook group community and let me know if you've tried any of these sleep hygiene suggestions or maybe even have something to add to my list. If you know someone who struggles with sleep, please consider sharing this episode with them invite them to join our community and, while you're still here, remember to subscribe and review the show. It really does impact the ability of other women to find us. If you haven't yet joined me on facebook or Instagram, you can find me at what women want today. Until next time, friends, I just want you to know I'm so glad you're here. Thank you so much for joining me. I hope you enjoyed today's conversation as much as I did. If you'd like to continue the conversation, come on over and join our private facebook group what women want today, and love to hang out with you some more there. Any resources mentioned in today's episode will be in the show notes. You can find me on facebook and Instagram at what women want to day podcast, or visit my website at what women want to daycom please remember to subscribe, download and share. Leave me a review. It helps other amazing women find the show and become a member of our community. One last thing for you today. You are not alone. You are worthy of love and a fulfilled life. Now it's time to go after it.

In-Stream Audio Search

NEW

Search across all episodes within this podcast

Episodes (89)